By Jessica Bashir-Stone
Growing up, I was always told that I was special and that I was here for a reason. The question now is why, right?
As a baby I was born two months earlier than I was originally meant to be. This is because I wasn’t breathing anymore. When I was born, I was able to fit into the palm of my dad’s hand. I then spent the next year of my life in hospital fighting for my life.
On my first birthday, I got wheeled from the ICU unit into the operation theatre, where the surgeons spent hours on hours fighting to re-build my windpipe.
Coming out of the theatre, my parents were waiting for me. Not knowing the outcome, they hoped for the best.
That was all well and good until they looked down at me. Hole in my throat, pipe coming out and unconscious; my mother looked at me and dropped to the floor. The surgeons had saved my life… but at what cost?
Transformed my life
I was one of the first five people in the United Kingdom to have this operation done, and one of the first three to survive. Having the tracheostomy has completely transformed my life and helped to mould me into the person that I am today.
A tracheostomy is a procedure in which surgeons create a hole into the windpipe just below the vocal cords. Through this hole they insert a pipe which helps airflow to the lungs.
Throughout school I was bullied and teased, and many people did not know how to treat me just because I had a scar on my neck. I was always affected by the name calling and the what if’s, but I have grown to love myself for it. If not me, then who?
I am grateful and happy I went through something so new and developmental to the medical world. Something that would shape me to be a light and happy young woman.
Going through something similar
Personally, I only know one other person who has had a tracheostomy in the UK, and I only met her a few months ago. As a child I was surrounded by some who would make it and others that wouldn’t, but I never had the chance to speak to anyone who had gone through something similar until recently.
Deya Goldsmith-Ryan is a 14-year-old student originally from the UK, who currently resides in Spain. Like me, Deya was only a baby when she had the procedure done.
From a young age, Deya had birthmarks on her cheeks. These birthmarks began to enlarge as months went by, but doctors weren’t concerned. As time went on the birthmarks started to become inflamed and Deya’s breathing was interrupted, meaning the only option was for a tracheostomy to be put in.
How does the tracheostomy makes Deya feel on a day-to-day basis? “I’m happy to have it because it makes me unique. When I was a lot younger, I would cover it up because I was embarrassed but now, I don’t care who sees it!”
“When I was little and in school people acted weird toward me because of it but the older I’ve gotten the more people understand and don’t really mind. One of my friends who I’ve known for three years only noticed it two months ago.”
Self-conscious about scars
Like Deya, I find it very pleasing when people don’t notice my scars. They are something I have been self-conscious about my whole life and I used to get so scared when people would comment on it, so I know personally how it feels when someone says they have never noticed it before. It’s a relief, like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.
Representation for people who have tracheostomies is small. Deya says: “I really don’t think there is enough representation as not many people know about it. I think if I were to change this, I would use social media as this is a great way to get the message out there to a wide group of people.”
Like myself, Deya has spent a lot of time in and out of hospital due to medical issues associated with the tracheostomy. The relationship that you build with the doctors over this time is phenomenal however nothing will ever compare to the relationship you are able to build with the guardian who takes you to your many appointments, and goes through these events with you.
For Deya and me, these people were our families. Deya says: “My siblings always say that they don’t remember the whole situation, but I know they are happy to explain when people ask. I also think due to all the doctor’s appointments and treatments I have had my mum has always been there, and that is a great bond. One that is extremely difficult to break.”
I couldn’t agree more.
When I had my tracheostomy there were very few procedures happening at the time. In this current day, there are at least 100,000 happening per year. This procedure saved me, and I owe the doctors, nurses and surgeons my life.
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